In desperate need of self-reflection
Writing is a process that helps me become more aware of myself. I haven't had the opportunity to do much recording of the many words that channel through me each day--so it is my intent to write more. While it may be boring to YOU that I am the subject of the majority of content I write--frankly, I don't quite give a fuck. For a while--I was able to indulge in the selfness it took to write visceral, meaningful and vulnerable poetry and prose. Now--I hate the thought of being so self indulgent make me cringe a bit. More than anything I want to share honestly. I want to share honestly without judging myself before others get the chance. And I want to share so honestly that in doing so it means I've left the fear of judgement behind.
Talk about yourself:
Multidimensional. My newest favorite label. I read it in an artist's bio and it resonated. I made a name reading tarot. But not just reading tarot--I gave readings that changed lives, I predicted births of children, played matchmaker and gave business advice that turned bountiful. I don't have words for where that gift came from, but I've spent a great amount of time fine tuning & enhancing that part of my self.
It's one of my things, but it's not my only thing--by any means. It has been both a benefit and a curse, so I'm comfortable letting my name be associated with grander pursuits. While I love my intuition I don't truly believe my abilities aren't any greater than anyone else's--I just truly have studied mine in greater depth the last 16 years. I've been prone to sharing my gift, but lately I've set more firm boundaries on the ways in which I choose to engage in the sensational and psychic pursuits, on which I got my start.
While this is a part of who I am, I have found great purpose in my newest venture and a wealth of creative influence. Placemaking. Live stage productions. Regional performance troupe. Marketing for the local Opera company. I find myself constantly inspired by the people I'm around and the places I get to go. I'm surrounded by powerful, talented humans who wear many hats. Booked, blessed and recruiting help and talent.
The things that are on my muse mind or that I'm addicted to right now: "Good Days" by Sza, pretty much anything that @thehalfasswitch puts out, rebranding's all around, spring cleaning for my digital dimensions, slowing down and streamlining management, the colors pink, orange and green, Indian food, cotton candy tye-dye, passionfruit seltzer, rehabbing my skin care line up for spring, booking vacations (really just going back to California as much as humanly possibly), manifesting, growing my thrive tribe, giving myself time and space to absorb inspirations, fortune cookies, the slow haul of renovating my wardrobe, making meaningful connections.
More than anything, I'm seeing and feeling myself more clearly than I ever have before. Some days I think to myself, no one gives a shit what you write in your blog...but then I remember--so fucking what?! In the end, it's worth giving myself something to look back on.