Recovering waste case

I don't like to waste. Over the past few years, I've wasted a lot and I'm working towards forgiving my Self. I'm also working on not being wasteful, by so many definitions. Time, energy, resources, love, wisdom. All things I've on people, places and things not in alignment with my highest good.

I came to this realization at the most peculiar moment. I swear my kids inspire me more than anything else these days.

I was standing at the garbage can, which was full. I was scraping 85% of yet another meal I made for my children. Looking down at the days worth of other food and snacks wasted, I felt wrong, I felt defeated and I felt drained. Like ready to hire a private chef to cook meals and help meal prep because I was throwing money and good food into the trash. Along with the time and energy it took to prepare, the emotional struggle to try to convince my kids that they need balanced nutrition and the knowing that they will be begging for snacks in just a few moments. Snacks they will inevitably waste, or spill onto the flour, or in between couch cushions.

Enraged I declared that night "WE ARE WASTEFUL! WE ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM!" I only mean to educate my children, but my tactics are a bit more emotionally charged lol. I'm trying to make peace with confronting this privilege. The privilege of knowing that I can waster what I have because I will never be without. It's a good thing this light bulb moment came almost a full year prior to quarantine because by the time March 2020 rolled around, I had really gotten into the grove of my creative resourcefulness.

I have really had to apply this notion of "waste reduction" to all the areas of my life. When it comes to habits, themes and patterns, I have learned that they can and will be present in every area of your life, if we let them. Especially the toxic ones, rooted in greed, lust and materialism/capitalism. I think of the work I've done, and the potentials I wasted. I think of my time spent in toxic relationships, and the love I wasted. I think of the fear that held me back, and the opportunity's I wasted. I think of my selfishness and the good people I wasted. I think of the vices I engaged in and the first impressions I wasted. I think of the signs the Universe has given me, and the lessons I wasted.

For me, the opposite of wastefulness is many things. Its gratitude, and appreciation. It's discernment, and self-control. It's maximizing resources that aren't meant to sustain. It's prioritizing, planning and making connections. It's saying yes and the right time and saying no at the right time. It's making decisions with foresight and changing my mindset to "less is more, because then there is always more." It's sharing, dividing, delegating and efficiency. It's thrifting and donating. Refurbishing and refashioning. It's finding and recognizing those in my life whose spaces I can fill, and who can fill my spaces.

I don't like waste and I think it brings bad karma. I'm not perfect but I am learning and I'm getting better. Some things that are helping:

I only take what I need, and know that I can come back if I need more.

I use both sides of the paper.

I refill my jars, bottle and containers.

I share my produce.

I set boundaries in my close relationships.

I seek out relationships that are fulfilling and reciprocal.

I use my resources creatively.

I share my resources accordingly.

I accept the process of letting go and holding on.

I communicate my needs.

I ask questions when I need to learn more.

I forgive my Self and release feelings of shame surrounding privilege and waste.

I support the most oppressed and share my resources with those who need them most.

I release fear of lack and the poverty mindset.

I increase my awareness on how I am using up my resources.

There is so much more than I can do. There is so much more I have been wanting to do. What have you learned about your sense of resourcefulness during the health & economic crisis?

<3 Q